This should not be news

"'So what else do you
want to know about me?' is
not conversation.

-Anonymous

First comes love...

He proposed marriage
a ring, a car, and a house
on first date. For reals.

-Robyn

No one is that hot.

"I'm so hot, I don't
have to leave my neighborhood
for dates." I'll pass, thanks.

-Anonymous

Perfect opportunity for the lemon law

trying to be nice
made me miss my booty call
please shut up now, dude.

-anonymous

A unisex problem

started to go down
the odor was terrible
be clean to enjoy

-anonymous

No. It's not.

"I'm only 5'6
but I have good posture so
it's like I'm 5'8."

 -Anonymous

Does anyone have good eHarmony experiences?

Funny profile, but

in person he's so awkward 

eHarmony fail 

-J

SoberSingleDC

Turned it all around

Ready to release
failed first date into the wild.
Then we kissed. Yowza!


-Robyn

tick...tock....

i like your profile
think we might make cute babies
i'm almost thirty

-anonymous

Oops

"Not sick -- swear to God!"

I gave my word, and a kiss...

He woke up with strep.

(I'm an asshole.)

-Katie

DateMeDC

At least wear cowboy boots if you're going to do that

Why do men add height
to profiles?  I can see you;
five nine you are not

-J
SoberSingleDC

It probably wouldn't be polite to laugh if you were the rabbi

Pretty rabbi talks
try to make good impression
oops, I split my pants.

-Anonymous 


Equally embarrassing moments? Share in the comments or send to datebrief at gmail dot com!

Protip: Only say you used to be awkward if you're no longer awkward.

"I used to be so
awkward. No sense of humor."
Nothing's changed, I see.

-Anonymous

What are you, four?

"Can you drive me the
two blocks home? I have to pee!"
Um, seriously?

-Anonymous

But everyone has unlimited texts

Separate text to wink?
I have limited texts, man.
Also you're a creep.

-Anonymous

Stage 5 clinger

Twenty texts per day:
"So how's your day going...now?"
We've been on one date!

-Anonymous

The Gentleman, in two parts

We were at the bar
He offered to buy a drink
He proposed 'water'

I declined his kiss
I wasn't dropped off at home
Even though he drove
 




-Anonymous

Better to find out early

Turns out he prefers

Wheel of Fortune over Jeop.--

We’re not meant to be.

-Anonymous

I'd be worried about falling asleep myself!

A married couple,
Date night starts at nine o'clock.
Hope the kids don't wake...

-Tom
BootLeGsampler

If wishes were horses...oh wait, that's what she's asking for.

Oh, God -- he's SO tall!
Six-six, and my only thought:
"Be proportionate!"

-Katie
Date me, DC!