This should not be news

"'So what else do you
want to know about me?' is
not conversation.

-Anonymous

First comes love...

He proposed marriage
a ring, a car, and a house
on first date. For reals.

-Robyn

Perfect opportunity for the lemon law

trying to be nice
made me miss my booty call
please shut up now, dude.

-anonymous

A unisex problem

started to go down
the odor was terrible
be clean to enjoy

-anonymous

I love having guys try to eat my face off.

It was our fourth date and our first kiss. Sadly our styles just didn't mesh: ex. I prefer that a guy not try to eat my face off.

-Anonymous

No. It's not.

"I'm only 5'6
but I have good posture so
it's like I'm 5'8."

 -Anonymous

Does anyone have good eHarmony experiences?

Funny profile, but

in person he's so awkward 

eHarmony fail 

-J

SoberSingleDC

Lame poetry does not help.

Guy, via text: "Roses are red, violets are blue. Your reaction's a shame, 'cause I really liked you."

-Anonymous

At least wear cowboy boots if you're going to do that

Why do men add height
to profiles?  I can see you;
five nine you are not

-J
SoberSingleDC

It probably wouldn't be polite to laugh if you were the rabbi

Pretty rabbi talks
try to make good impression
oops, I split my pants.

-Anonymous 


Equally embarrassing moments? Share in the comments or send to datebrief at gmail dot com!

Protip: Only say you used to be awkward if you're no longer awkward.

"I used to be so
awkward. No sense of humor."
Nothing's changed, I see.

-Anonymous

What are you, four?

"Can you drive me the
two blocks home? I have to pee!"
Um, seriously?

-Anonymous

But everyone has unlimited texts

Separate text to wink?
I have limited texts, man.
Also you're a creep.

-Anonymous

The two hours after that were just an expensive free dinner

For me, the date ended when he asked me in total seriousness, “Why do you want to learn Spanish?  It’s not like you’ll be working in California…”

-Anonymous

I wish this existed

Nothing says lemon law like overenthusiasm in the first 30 seconds, especially when you're yelling at me with that thick New York accent.

-Anonymous

Newsflash: That does not make you special.

Me: Why should I go out with you again?
Him: Depends. Do u like that I think ur sexy?

-Anonymous

Stage 5 clinger

Twenty texts per day:
"So how's your day going...now?"
We've been on one date!

-Anonymous

The Gentleman, in two parts

We were at the bar
He offered to buy a drink
He proposed 'water'

I declined his kiss
I wasn't dropped off at home
Even though he drove
 




-Anonymous

Better to find out early

Turns out he prefers

Wheel of Fortune over Jeop.--

We’re not meant to be.

-Anonymous

"You're so pretty, let's look at scantily-clad other women!"

Been dating a guy for 6 weeks. We had dinner and after he suggested we meet some of his friends at a bar. Said bar was a strip club.

-A Single Girl